Staying true to yourself is one of the hardest things you have to learn. During life, you will overcome a lot of obstacles, in which you may lose yourself. Maybe you start to become someone your friends want you to be, or someone you make yourself become to impress people, or you just decide you don’t really like yourself. But you must hold on to the you that is really you. Staying true to yourself is one of the most important things, and I learned this over a few very confusing school years.
Going to a new school is hard for everyone. You have to meet new people, make new friends, adjust to new teachers and schedules and workloads. I moved through three different schools all in about three years. I moved from my old school in Georgia to a school in New Canaan for about one and a half years, then to Cider Mill in Wilton for fourth grade, then to New Canaan Country School in fifth. I got used to being the new girl, and I got used to not having friends for a while. I also became a pro at adjusting.
When I came into New Canaan Country School in fifth grade, I noticed how preppy everyone was. I noticed all the Polo shirts, all the Lilly Pulitzer, the khakis and ballet flats and cardigans. It was all pretty new to me – I had only ever been in public schools before, and I didn’t even notice what people wore when I lived in Georgia. At first, I didn’t think too much of it. But after a while, I noticed the definitive groups – the “popular” group and then everyone else. I figured out the social hierarchy. I noticed how they dressed and acted, and I realized the difference between them and me. They seemed to always wear at least one of the following: J. Crew, headbands, ballet flats or an Abercrombie shirt. They seemed to all really like lacrosse, and basically, they all lived in New Canaan (but I couldn’t do much about that.) Of course, the only thing that television teaches you when you’re little is how the “popular” group works, and how it’s basically every girl’s struggle to try and get into that group. So, I figured that’s what I had to do.
I decided to start with clothing. Clothing is how everyone expresses himself or herself, and it can also be the basis of friendships. If you dress alike, then you probably have similar tastes in other things too. So, I started wanting to look like the other girls here at school. I started wearing more J. Crew (a LOT more J. Crew), more Polo shirts, and khaki pants. Before, I didn’t really care too much about what I looked like. All of a sudden, it meant so much to me.
Teenagers are stereotyped. And in that stereotype, there is the classic struggle that we have of trying to figure out who we are. Which is totally true, by the way. So, I was going through this, but it seemed so much harder because I didn’t even know the old me. I had tried so hard to please other people that I didn’t even hang out with that I had forgotten the person I was before. My closet was riddled with Polo shirts and cardigans, which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing – but it wasn’t me. I had tried so hard to impress others that I forgot to remember myself. The self who likes Converse, enjoys photography and art, and who likes to listen to alternative rock music and write.
It took a long time before I realized that it actually didn’t matter. Eighth grade was when I really got a grip on those things. The friends that I had already accepted me for who I was, and they loved me for it. I didn’t need to impress them, or change myself to please them. The only person I needed to please was myself, and I felt so much better when I learned this. It’s hard enough, being a teenager, without having to backtrack and find the real you, who got lost somewhere on the way. So, what I want to tell you all is that staying true to yourself is really one of the most important things. I’m Charlotte Murphy, and this I believe.
No comments:
Post a Comment